I just added my new product Affiliate Marketing SAS to JV Zoo, so if you want to earn 50%
commissions on any sales as an affiliate, please take a look at the sales page here.
‘Affiliate Marketing S.A.S.’ is a powerful new Top Quality, Step
By Step Video Course where I reveal Simple Strategies for
producing big profits by promoting affiliate products (like all of the
products that you can promote and generate a commission from at
Clickbank.com, among others)…
The product sells for $27.00 and you get 50% for each sale, so if you want to earn some
extra cash and help people get ahead in the
affiliate marketing arena, please take a look, you may be glad you
My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning, can you believe that….2:30am?! Luckily for him I was still up playing my Bagpipes.
The Grim Reaper came for me last night, and I beat him off with a
vacuum cleaner. Talk about Dyson with death.
Paddy says “Mick, I’m thinking of buying a Labrador .”Really, …” says Mick “have you seen how many of their owners go blind”
I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the
biggest p* nis she had ever laid her hands on. I said “You’re pulling my leg”.
I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice!! At least I presume
she was poor – she only had $3.50 in her purse.
My girlfriend thinks that I’m a stalker. Well, she’s not exactly my
I woke up last night to find the ghost of Gloria Gaynor standing at
the foot of my bed. At first I was afraid…….then I was petrified.
The wife has been missing a week now. Police said to prepare for the worst. So I have been to the charity shop to get all her clothes back.
A mate of mine recently admitted to being addicted to brake fluid.
When I quizzed him on it he reckoned he could stop any time….
I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a grave. As I was standing there I noticed 4 grave diggers walking about with a Coffin, 3 hours later and they’re still walking about with it. I thought to myself, they’ve lost the plot!!
My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went to
Our local pet shop and they were $70!!! blow this, I thought, I can
get one cheaper off the web.
Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not Happy.
I was at a cash point yesterday when a little old lady asked if I
could check her balance, so I pushed her over.
I start a new job in Seoul next week. I thought it was a good Korea move.
I was driving this morning when I saw an NRMA van parked . The driver was sobbing uncontrollably and looked very miserable. I thought to myself ‘that guy’s heading for a breakdown.’
If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already,
three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and
she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion?
Read the next question before looking at the response for this one.
It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote
Here are the facts about the three candidates.
Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologists.
He’s had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10
Martinis a day.
He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium
in college and drinks a quart of whisky every evening.
He is a decorated war hero. He’s a vegetarian, doesn’t smoke,
drinks an occasional beer and never committed adultery.
Which of these candidates would be our choice?
Decide first… No peeking, and then scroll down for the response.
Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C is Adolf Hitler.
And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question:
If you said YES, you just killed Beethoven.
Pretty interesting isn’t it?
Makes a person think before judging someone.
Amateurs … Built the ark.
Professionals … Built the Titanic
We all know that to make sales in any business, we need to have customers! How do we get customers? We have to show them what we have to offer. It’s no good opening a shop and not telling anyone you just opened!! You need to let them know what you do and how they can get hold of your
product or service.
With an online business, it’s all about numbers (as with most businesses) “The more you tell, the more you sell” You must have a constant stream of targeted traffic to your offer/product, otherwise there are no sales. Sales are the life blood of any business be it online or off.
I’m so pleased to finally see that somebody has thought of the little guys when creating a product.
Dave Nicholson has just released an excellent new product called tackling just this issue. ‘Total Web Traffic’ and it really does offer exactly what is needed for the every day user.
Total Web Traffic is a great traffic course with loads of high quality videos that show you where to get started and there is a whole load of information, advice and tips, separated into tidy little modules so that it’s really easy to follow.
There are even interviews with some massive marketers who explain their own methods that they use to gain immense amounts of targeted traffic to their sites.
I would really recommend this for anybody, either starting out or even fully established. Because, like Dave says: “Why settle for a few hundred if you can have a few thousand, and why settle for a few thousand when you can have a few hundred thousand visitors”
No matter what side of the AISLE you’re on, THIS is FUNNY!
Judy Walkman, a professional genealogy researcher in southern California, was doing some personal work on her own family tree. She discovered that Senator Harry Reid’s great-great uncle, Remus Reid, was hanged for horse stealing and train robbery in Montana in 1889. Both Judy and Harry Reid share this common ancestor.
Above is the only known photograph of Remus. It shows him standing on the gallows in Montana territory:
On the back of the picture Judy obtained during her research is this inscription: ‘Remus Reid, horse thief, sent to Montana Territorial Prison 1885, escaped 1887, robbed the Montana Flyer six times. Caught by Pinkerton detectives, convicted and hanged in 1889.’
So Judy recently e-mailed Senator Harry Reid for information about their great-great uncle.
Believe it or not, Harry Reid’s staff sent back the following biographical sketch for her genealogy research:
“Remus Reid was a famous cowboy in the Montana Territory . His business empire grew to include acquisition of valuable equestrian assets and intimate dealings with the Montana railroad. Beginning in 1883, he devoted several years of his life to government service, finally taking leave to resume his dealings with the railroad. In 1887, he was a key player in a vital investigation run by the renowned Pinkerton Detective Agency. In 1889, Remus passed away during an important civic function held in his honor when the platform upon which he was standing collapsed.”
NOW THAT’s how it’s done, Folks! That’s real POLITICAL SPIN !!!
There is an old Hotel/Pub in Marble Arch, London, which used to have a gallows adjacent to it. Prisoners were taken to the gallows (after a fair trial of course) to be hung. The horse-drawn dray, carting the prisoner, was accompanied by an armed guard, who would stop the dray outside the pub and ask the prisoner if he would like ”ONE LAST DRINK’‘. If he said YES, it was referred to as ONE FOR THE ROAD. If he declined, that prisoner was ON THE WAGON.
So there you go. More bleeding history.
They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot and then once a day it was taken and sold to the tannery. If you had to do this to survive you were “p!ss poor”, but worse than that were the really poor folk, who couldn’t even afford to buy a pot, they “Didn’t have a pot to p!ss in” and were the lowest of the low.
The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn’t just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s:
Most people got married in June, because they took their yearly bath in May and they still smelled pretty good by June. However, since they were starting to smell, brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odour. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.
Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, “Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water!”
Houses had thatched roofs, thick straw piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof. Hence the saying “It’s raining cats and dogs.”
There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom, where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That’s how canopy beds came into existence.
The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, “dirt poor.” The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside.. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way. Hence: a thresh hold. (Getting quite an education, aren’t you?)
In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight, then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme: ”Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot, nine days old”.
Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over they would hang up their bacon, to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, “Bring home the bacon.” They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around talking and ”chew the fat”.
Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning and death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.
Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or ”The Upper Crust”.
Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of ”Holding a Wake”.
England was old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people, so they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realised they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, thread it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift) to listen for the bell; thus someone could be, ”Saved by the Bell ”or was considered a ”Dead Ringer”
And that’s the truth.
Now, whoever said history was boring ! ! !
So .. . . get out there and educate someone! Share these facts with a friend, like I just did!
Margarine was originally manufactured to fatten turkeys. When it killed the turkeys, the people who had put all the money into the research wanted a payback so they put their heads together to figure out what to do with this product to get their money back.
It was a white substance with no food appeal so they added the yellow colouring and sold it to people to use in place of butter. How do you like it? They have come out with some clever new flavourings….
DO YOU KNOW the difference between margarine and butter?
Read on to the end…gets very interesting!
Both have the same amount of calories.
Butter is slightly higher in saturated fats at 8 grams; compared to 5 grams for margarine.
Eating margarine can increase heart disease in women by 53% over eating the same amount of butter, according to a recent Harvard Medical Study.
Eating butter increases the absorption of many other nutrients in other foods.
Butter has many nutritional benefits where margarine has a few and only because they are added!
Butter tastes much better than margarine and it can enhance the flavours of other foods.
Butter has been around for centuries where margarine has been around for less than 100 years.
And now, for Margarine..
Very High in Trans fatty acids.
Triples risk of coronary heart disease …
Increases total cholesterol and LDL (this is the bad cholesterol) and lowers HDL cholesterol, (the good cholesterol)
Increases the risk of cancers up to five times..
Lowers quality of breast milk
Decreases immune response.
Decreases insulin response.
And here’s the most disturbing fact… HERE IS THE PART THAT IS VERY INTERESTING!
Margarine is but ONE MOLECULE away from being PLASTIC… and shares 27 ingredients with PAINT
These facts alone were enough to have me avoiding margarine for life and anything else that is hydrogenated (this means hydrogen is added, changing the molecular structure of the substance).
Open a tub of margarine and leave it open in your garage or shaded area. Within a couple of days you will notice a couple of things:
* no flies, not even those pesky fruit flies will go near it (that should tell you something)
* it does not rot or smell differently because it has no nutritional value; nothing will grow on it. Even those teeny weeny microorganisms will not a find a home to grow. Why? Because it is nearly plastic . Would you melt your Tupperware and spread that on your toast?
Share This With Your Friends…..(If you want to ‘butter them up’ for better health)!
When someone shares something of value with you and you benefit from it, you have a moral obligation to share it with others.
FACT: Every Computer Hard Drive Will Crash At Some Point!
FACT: 70% of Computer Users Never Back up!
FACT: You Can Back up Online Every Month For Less Than The Cost of A Pizza! (And so aid restful sleep!!)
If your PC has ever crashed then you know the awful feeling knowing that you’ve possibly lost all your precious files, folders, photos, videos, emails, tax documents and more. If you’re one of the 70% of PC users who never back up, then you’re running the risk of losing all the above.
I speak from experience as this happened to me about a year ago. I knew I should have backed up but never got round to it and then it happened. I lost almost everything on my hard drive, even my operating system. Kid’s photos and videos, emails, the lot, it was gut wrenching. To know that one simple application could have saved everything for me.
As I type this, I now have a fantastic piece of software working in the background every time I switch on my PC, backing everything up, all the time. I don’t need to worry about backing up to disks or external hard drives, My PC Backup does it all for me. It’s a simple desktop application that runs behind the scenes, silently backing up everything I want it to.
The My PC Backup application allows you to store your precious memories and access them from anywhere in the world on any computer or even your mobile phone. You can even sync your files between all your devices, smart phone, laptop and PC.
Don’t run the risk of losing years worth of memories, your iTunes library or any other precious photos or videos. I can highly recommend this software so please, do yourself a favour and start using My PC Backup to store your important files. One day you may be glad you did.
PS. You can try it out for 14 days free of charge too!!